Ewwww! Gross!!!

**WARNING**

Gross pictures to follow.

So, over the weekend, Harlie seemed to get ultra sensitive about her face, mouth and jaw area. She kept pulling her trach collar away from her jaw when I put her to bed. But, I didn't think much of it. I just thought she was being weird. What a great mom I am!

And she started really crying when we would try to brush her teeth. You know, we can only brush the outside of her teeth since her jaw is still wired shut. But, normally she would let us in there to brush what we could.

And she started to smell a little worse than normal. Well, her new normal - with her jaw wired shut. Just a weird, funky odor. My poor sweet girl!

Anyway, on Saturday I took some video of her (that will be posted soon I hope) and when I watched the video on my computer I noticed that her incisions looked really red. But, again, I didn't think much of it.

On Sunday morning, I noticed that she had some dry, powdery looking stuff on her incisions. I just thought it was dry secretions, so I got a warm washcloth and tried to clean it off. Well, she pitched a holy fit crying and carrying on. Oh, I'm so terrible that I just gave up and said, "Geez, Harlie. What's your problem!?" And got her dressed and went on about our day.

Finally on Sunday night, I really looked at her incisions and there it was.

Grossness.

They were really bumpy and swollen - like not equally swollen - swollen in different amounts in different areas - creating a bumpy kind of look. And it looked like there was goo in there. Ew! Definitely infected. Ugh!

But she didn't have a fever! And she wasn't acting any different - as long as you weren't messing with her face! So, I knew first thing in the morning it was straight to the doctor.

So, Brandy arrives this morning. While Harlie was still sleeping, I wanted to show Brandy what it looked like. So, I got a flashlight and we went in to have a look. Well, Holy Infection! It burst during the night!!!! Blech!!! There was pus everywhere! And there is this one spot - the spot that took the longest to heal initially - that is like a hole in her jaw. It is so yucky, I just can't do a good job of explaining it.

So, of course, I took a picture.

I figure if I have to see it - then so should you.

But, I must warn you. The following photos are not for the faint of heart. To me, they're pretty gnarly. But, maybe that's because it's my little girl. Maybe looking at photos like this isn't that bad if it's someone else's little girl. I wouldn't know, as I've not ever seen photos like these. Just another perk of being me and living my life I suppose.

So here you go...







Her doctor took some pus for a culture. That was no fun. Harlie was in so much pain! He said we'll hear back in the next few days. Hopefully we'll hear back before Thursday, just in case it has any impact on getting her wires out. He also gave her a shot of Rocephin - which is what he calls "the big guns" as far as an antibiotic that he can give her. Oh boy, after he had to get some pus for the culture (which was super gross, thank God that Brandy traded places with me so she was the one who got to see that up close) and she got the shot (which the nurse said burns pretty bad) Harlie was one unhappy little girl. Oh, I felt so bad for her.

So, after I comforted her (which she is beginning to let me do, thankfully) and she calmed down, we all started to pack up and put on our coats. Then all of a sudden, Harlie started crying again. Like a real sad cry. And I said to Brandy, "What's her problem?"

WOW! What a crummy mommy I am!!! Luckily, I realized it as soon as I said it.

My poor little girl has a gaping, pus seeping hole in her jaw, she smells like an infection and she just got a burning shot in her leg!!! Of COURSE she's crying! Heck, it hurts my stomach just to look at her! Yet here I am, pushing her to get over it and move on the next thing. Ugh. In my defense, that's probably a self-protective instinct coming into play. But that's too deep of a topic for this post.

Anyway, I simply can't imagine what it feels like to be her. What a tough cookie she is!!!

Well, that's all the grossness I have for today. I'm sure you appreciate getting to the end of this post! I'll certainly let you know how she's doing tomorrow!

Take care,
Christy