Post-Op Day 3

9pm FRIDAY

We are home! Everything went well with the discharge. I got a little bit of a scare because the last vitals the nurse took showed that Harlie had a fever. Which, in my understanding, is completely normal after this type of surgery - (when they have messed with your brain). The neurosurgeon was the last to sign off on her discharge (after Tom happened to pass him in the hallway and grab him). He asked, “any fevers”? I was like, uh oh. But he was fine with hers and said that as long as it doesn’t get too high, it was fine. And she could have one off and on for the next week, so don’t be surprised. We just have to look out for signs of infection around her incisions.

Overall she looks better, I think. I know from here on out she will continue to look better as the swelling goes down and the bruises start to change into all kinds of lovely colors. But, it is still hard on Tom and I. Dr. Magee came by to see her this morning and he said that it is probably hurting me a lot more than it is hurting her at this point. Which is probably true. Well, I hope it’s true anyway. She just looks like she is hurting so much and no parent wants their child to hurt – period.

And I miss her smile. And I miss her sweet little face. I look at old pictures of her and it is just weird (and sad) to know that I won’t see that little face again. I know she will still be her, and that her personality will shine through (it already has a little bit) but nothing will change the strangeness of it all. From what I’ve learned about reconstructive plastic surgery to the face – my feelings are completely normal. I don’t need a pep talk and I know all the positives (they are what get me through the tough times, after all), but I feel the way I feel and nothing but time will help that. So often I find myself wishing time away…

Well, I’ve cleaned her incisions twice now. Not fun. And unlike when the nurse did it yesterday, it seemed to bother her. Which made it not fun even more. Hopefully we will both get used to it and each day hopefully it will bother us less. I only have to do it for one more week.

So, as I was trying to get her ready for bed (not the normal smooth process tonight) Murphy somehow grabbed the cup of half peroxide, half water solution that I made for her incisions and..…you guessed it….. drank it. Ugh. What is up with my kid??? He was not happy about that at all. Now keep in mind that I know nothing about peroxide – despite all my Harlie training – I am NOT a nurse – so I looked at the label and it says to call poison control if swallowed. Luckily, I only used a very small amount of peroxide, so I know it wasn’t much. Tom called poison control and she said that he will be fine and worst case is he’ll throw up. He probably just burned his tongue and throat a bit (and gave us mild heart attacks). That was over an hour ago, and he’s fine now. Just another perfectly normal boring night in the Holton household. You can admit it – you want our life, don’t you? I know. I get that all the time. (Hey, even when I’m tired and irritable I still have a sense of humor.)

Well, that’s all I can do tonight. Each night from here on out I am going to look forward to seeing more and more of my sweet little girl’s new face.

Thank you for all your kind words of support. I appreciate each and every one more than you know.

Take care,
Christy